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Secret Languages of Teens

Are you a bit freaked out by your teen's use of secret code, whether when IMing or texting? You're right if you think that this code is, in part, designed to keep you in the dark. In some cases, this secrecy is actually just a functional way for your child to establish boundaries and do their job as a teen--to seperate and create their own identity. On the other hand, if your child is involved in high risk behaviors, this secrecy can prevent you from doing your job as a parent--to provide safety for your child.

Be assured that secret languages are nothing new. Ememberay igpay atinlay? The web and phone technology, however, allow for a very powerful type of secret networking that can be hazardous for young people who are easily influenced, or who are drawn to high risk behaviors. The following link to an article by ABC News offers a balanced look at teen code, along with some practical resources for parents.

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/AmericanFamily/story?id=2820582&page=1

Posted by Will Laughlin on January 15, 2008 12:33 PM |

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Comments (3)

 Terry Tierney:

Will,
this is an excellent article! Having 2 daughters myself who are becoming quite savvy on the computer, this kind of "inside scoop" will help me stay informed and in tune with the communications that are taking place.

Keep passing along important tips like these!
Terry

Posted by Terry Tierney | January 15, 2008 1:48 PM

Posted on January 15, 2008 13:48

david herz:

Ahhh. A secret language indeed. I sure would like to know it!!! I have also heard that you can by software programs so you can read all of your kids e-mails without them knowing about it.

Hmmmm. Not sure how I feel about that. Anyone else?

Posted by david herz | January 17, 2008 2:34 PM

Posted on January 17, 2008 14:34

Rohini Ross:

Thanks for speaking to the upside and down-side of a secret code. It helps me realize my kids are individuating, but I must not forgo my parental responsibility to keep them safe.

As for programs that let your read all of your kids emails without them knowing about it. It feels like a boundary violation to me. Perhaps there is a better way to stay informed by working together. And if you really can't trust your kids to use email or text messages safely it might be better to limit their access until you are more comfortable with them being able to handle the responsibility.

Posted by Rohini Ross | January 29, 2008 8:17 PM

Posted on January 29, 2008 20:17

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